Responses to Let Us Prey

The response to Let Us Prey has been somewhat overwhelming. Every week I get at least three lengthy emails from victims of these predatory pastors. The writers have either read the original research paper or the book and are for the first time feeling a sense of no longer being isolated and alone in their experience. I get the same response wherever I go to speak about narcissist pastors - people finally know that they are not alone, that they were not at fault, that they did nothing to deserve what was done to them. 
Some emails are from associate pastors who have been forced out by a narcissist and who now doubt everything about themselves and their call to ministry. Others are from the ex-husbands and wives of narcissist pastors who find for the first time someone who actually understands what they have gone through. One woman exclaimed, "You get it!" Still others are from church board members and congregants trying to figure out what is happening and what to do.

  • A woman I had never met gave me a huge hug and said, "You saved my son's life, sanity, marriage, and ministry." She had her picture taken with me and sent it to her son, who had been under attack from a narcissist senior pastor and was questioning his call to ministry. Glenn and I had been coaching him and his wife since his mom sent him the CD from my 2015 presentation at the American Association of Christian Counselors World Conference in Nashville. 
  • I have lost count of the women (and a few men) who wrote that they were or had been married to a narcissist pastor. The experience was devastating not only to the adults but also to the children who exist (in the narcissistic mind) only to glorify the narcissist parent.  Understand what had happened and how they were all victimized was helping them regain emotional healing.

I really had little idea of where all of this would go when the book came out, but I find myself being a pastor to people with narcissistic wounds. I'm all in.

What's your story?  Send it to me at Darrell@conflicttopeace.com